Time

A slave to the times, We follow like lost dogs. If you run to where it is, You’ll never catch it. Savor the moment, Others have forgotten, In favor of the Times.

Time, that vicious circle. That makes memory fade away, And tradition become ruin. Guard against its rust and decay, we must keep our strength and faith!

Or have you forgotten The Hammer and Sickle, That reaped so many lives With a zeitgeist so fickle.

Or perhaps the Yellow brick Road, Which shone like Stars For the eyes of one man And his people compliant?

Time is a hypocrite: In pointing at our future, We repeat the past.

I feel born into the afterparty of great american society. The Culture Wars go on, but the most important battles have already been fought.

Initiate: Weekly Planning Session! (loud blaring noises and lights)

"The Fire Within," by Chris D'Lacey

Never make a dragon cry! I think that the story is about the way we relate to each other, and David’s relationships with the Pennykettles and Sophie represents this, going through the breakup and then coming back together. But, the biggest example is (spoiler) when David struggles with the reality that Gadzooks is real and upsets the dragon by telling him he’s not real, that David doesn’t need him, that he’s just a piece of pottery, and pushes Gadzooks to shed a fire tear, a tear that contains his soul. However, David comes to the rescue to catch his fire tear and gives it back to Gadzooks by shedding a tear of his own.

I really liked this (kids) book, it felt like a modern English fairy tale with, of course, a happy ending. I envied Lucy for her steadfast and childish nature, but I think we can see ourselves in David and Liz, too. Unless I’m wrong, which occasionally I am, the next few books are a little mind-bending.

Thanks for reading! -Lotus

If you’re not frightened of a false election, you don’t belong in a republic or democracy of any kind, regardless of your stance.

Leftover Bavarian cream + old pancakes = lunch.

There are two kinds of people: those who create and those who consume. I swear, I just wrote this, but it’s important enough to say it again.

“Hrrr.” - Gruffen, from The Fire Within, by Chris D’Lacey. Bring on the complex multidimensional plot in a children’s book that I stopped reading years ago! Don’t look at me that way, you read Harry Potter every year too. Ravenclaw, obviously.

Anyways, who still has their Walkman? I’m supposed to avoid YouTube for my health, it’s a special diet called “stop-making-money-off-me-you-stupid-leeches.”

We’re the counter-counter revolution. Call us belonging outside belonging outside belonging. Do not obey! The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. Call us terrorists, because truth will strike terror into the heart of a liar.

If you try to make yourself look like someone else, you’re never going to be happy.

Revelation: Your productivity (and perhaps the quality of your life) is directly linked to the amount of stupid YouTube videos you watch. Who’da thunk?

At best, government is a necessary evil. Do you know who said that?

Riddle me this; How can you ask others to trust the government if you yourself rebel against it for corruption and other reasons? Furthermore, how can you claim that the government is corrupt and be a part of it? Are you claiming you are corrupt as well?

Somewhat Weekly Update 4/24/21

For my birthday, I got a job. It’s a pretty great first job, not counting a family cafe and a short span making merch for another cafe, but practicing my budgeting skills I would have to work somewhere around 125 hours a month to pay for food, rent, and unforeseens. And that’s the cheap end, without a car or really anything. I don’t understand how people pay for cars, car insurance, gas, their mortgage and utilities or huge rent. Why would you even want that? (Tip to self - You want to have three months of expenses saved for unforeseens.)

Other lesson - gas is expensive. We’ve basically been paying gas money for me to go work. Lesson number three - If you can save half your earnings, you will have a good life no matter what job you have. The trick is not spending it.

Other than that, I’m still making my way through the GED study guide. I feel like I literally don’t make the same connections that they want me to make on the test. I also started working on a Tron RPG called Enter the Grid. Hoping to get a Tempo mechanic working and unique, but make combat deadly and Initiative focused. I think it’s coming along nicely, but I’ve also got the other RPGs on the backburner, Grim and Shamans.

Finally, we also got to play a shakespearean-radio-opera rpg based on improv. Pretty great, but wacky too, and ended up with my main character performing deus-ex goat. I think that sums the playtest up. Ciao! Stay frosty.

"The Devil and Karl Marx" - Paul Kengor

Totalitarianism seeks to fundamentally change human nature through political-ideological-cultural upheaval.

Then, the change was material, but in the years after Marx’s death, Communists sought to change the revolution into a sexual-cultural-spiritual revolution to “liberate” the proletariat from bourgeoisie concepts. Instead of seizing the factories, they seized the “cultural means of production” to create nothing less than a complete and ideological revolution. Family, religion, tradition, and even gender are just things to be overthrown in the form of social justice and defense of the “oppressed.”

They would use any means necessary to confuse and convert the public through infiltration and blackmail to the creation of deceitful front organizations. The morality of a Communist is to the party. You cannot be a good Communist and be religious. Oh, and by the way, some of the head Marxist-Freudists were satanist pedophiles, if that’s a surprise. North Amercan Man-Boy Love Association was the work of a Communist and LGBTQ leader Harry Hay.

First fermenting experiment! 🍾🧪🍎 Hope it doesn’t kill me :p

Weekly Update 3/21/21

So, reading about fermenting drinks like beers, wine, tepache, kvass, cider, vinegar, brine, and the like. Also, kefir, kombucha, and yogurt! Very interesting stuff, cooking. I just hope the bacteria/yeasts don’t kill me 😵

Been in a slump regarding my game design, looking for some feedback soon. Looking for that GED prep book. Also, reading about the Bolshevik revolution. I must be on a non-fiction kick. Very interesting conundrum regarding Grigory Rasputin, whereas my Russian lit mother learned he was the devil, this book (2017) says they were plotting to kill him and frame him as a machiavelli figure. Totally possible either way.

And meanwhile, trying to get kids at the park to get along. Kids have so much crap in their lives nowadays, right? I don’t remember there being this much unhappiness.

"The End of Tsarist Russia" by Dominic Lieven

In the brief period before World War I, many political, cultural, and social factors combined to create the massive eastern conflict that dragged in half the globe and spawned the Bolshevik revolution.

Empires required lots of military power and economic growth to sustain, and required a state to produce this. Many of the great powers were centered around the idea of a balance of power between six great powers in Europe in two alliances, which generally prevented war. However, the massive shifts in the Balkans shook this balance, especially as nationalism came to the rise.

Germans feared the surrounding alliance between Russia, France, and England, just as Russia was sure to become a massive empire in time, owing to its vast human resources and land, especially in Siberia and Ukraine. If there was ever a military time to strike, it was now, which conflicted with their previous policy of peace between the related Nicholas II and William II, respective leaders of Germany and Russia, and the idea that imperial states required land. Land that was hard to find in Central Europe.

Meanwhile, public opinion cried out for the inevitable conflict between teuton and slav, notably the pan-slav paper Novoe Vremia. Although liberals in the bourgeouis and Duma explained that only a full democracy would sate the interests of the people, which was likely true, public opinion often wasn’t of much help either, being formed primarily by the elite. Conservatives claimed that allowing a democracry to take place would let in socialist radicals, and they too were probably correct. The average Russian farmed, and war would only take up needed helping hands.

And then there were the military in Russia who hungered for war as a chance to prove their worth, and a societal claim to fame that ignored faulty military preparedness. Also consider that the Duma was a newly created part of government, and the traditional monarchical structure placed a great deal of strain on the Tsar and his Ministers and slowed down action drastically. Russia’s mobility was a nightmare, as was their military strength.

Russia also had a long term plan to take the Straits and free the Slavs to become a pan-slav state, but there were many issues with this, not regarding that they only accepted Russian as the slavic language to be used and various conflicts inside the slav culture. Their best attempt at this in foreign policy was likely in the Balkan League with Serbia, but in the period before 1914, the Balkans and the dissolution of the Ottoman Empire was a bomb waiting to go off. When the Archduke Franz Ferdinand was assassinated by a rogue pan-slav group (The Black Hand), that allowed Austria to start a war before consulting with any of the other great powers.

Finally, none of the great powers expected a conflict to last this long, and it was well known that a drawn-out conflict would destroy the economies of Europe. What they didn’t know is that it would wreck the lives of millions of people on other continents and around the globe. One would hope that such a disaster would prevent another.

Whoof. That was long.

Weekly Update 3/13/21

Today, was going to help set up an Arts&Music fest in my town, but they wouldn’t let me help volunteer because I wasn’t wearing a mask. I have a breathing condition, the thing’s outside, and nobody gave a crap yesterday. Oh well.

Just finished reading the Great Gatsby and The End of Tsarist Russia, coming soon. Also getting GED prep! With everything in limbo it makes no sense to go through high school— what’s the point? I could educate myself with books, and I don’t want to sit on my hands.

Received a good bit of advice from chess. “The highest level is planning. If you can move from ‘reactionary’ to a ‘planning’ strategy, you’ll be much better off in life.”

“The Great Gatsby” -F. Scott Fitzgerald

Nick, a young bondsman from the Midwest, moves to West Egg, New York, right next door to the mysterious and wealthy Jay Gatsby, who passionately pursues his cousin Daisy. Only, in the time Gatsby spent reinventing himself, Daisy has married a cheating scoundrel.

Lesson - People change. Also, a lot of people are “bad drivers” — it takes two to make a wreck. The man who was “better than the rest combined” was killed because he met another bad driver.

Weekly Update 2.27.21

So… I finished that game Call of the Siren somewhat, friendly designer said I should tinker with it more, but personally I don’t want to spend too much time on a side project. I find that I’ve been spending too much time on rpgs and not enough time on what they’re supposed to be: played with others. Sometimes we need to take a step back and think about what our projects will actually achieve for us, and what they’re intended for. It’s easy to get caught up in the details and forget to zoom out. So I’m learning stuff about myself and trying to grow, being grateful (doesn’t that feel weaponized?), being humble, being diligent about doing what needs done. I’m in a good place to do that, far from traveling every day with no end in sight. (A good side effect is that my calender has finally synced with me, and I know what day it is! That hasn’t happened since… the beginning of Covid?) Been reading “The Devil and Karl Marx,” but that guy was screwed up. Can’t wait to get my “The End of Tsarist Russia” back from the library, they have this weird return policy. I’ve also added a core reading list to my homeschool plans. But, all in all, the weather hasn’t been nicer and the palm trees haven’t sung louder in the wind.

“The War of the Worlds” -H.G. Wells

High-tech Martians invade Britain and ruthlessly slaughter and kill humanity, attempting to shepherd and colonise them for resources and food. They face practically no resistance, and all seems hopeless until they are destroyed by disease: for the Martians have no immune systems to protect them. “Surely, if we have learned nothing else, this war has taught us pity—pity for those witless souls that suffer our dominion.” Like the Martians, a colonial society built on a complete lack of empathy or understanding cannot last. Even the Martians were bitten by the soldier ants in humanity: blown away by multiple shells and rammed by the Thunderhead.

Weekly Update 2.20.21

  • Been reading “The End of Tsarist Russia” by Dominic Lieven. Interesting to read about how all the different political, economic, social, and cultural spheres affected foreign policy and the development of pre-1914 Imperial Russia.
  • Also finished the War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells. Really fantastic novel/ette.
  • Finally, working on finishing layout and illustrations for Call of the Siren. I learned how to use Affinity! Somewhat. Scribus wasn’t really working for me.

In twenty years, where do I want to be? Land and house in Colorado, land and house in Florida, or in another country? I can barely plan ahead of this year, but one part of me wants the seasons back. Probably not a good idea from my standpoint in a warm spring.

Back in Black ✍🏽🤯✍🏽

Hey I’m back! Back in Black. JK, but I am trying to revamp my blog and my education so people actually can prove that I consume books for sustenance. Will be posting book summaries with title, plot, and lesson/quote in addition to weekly updates. What craziness goes on in the world around.💉 By the way, did you know I’m making a Mork Borg adventure? Check it out at lotus-rpgs.itch.io/call-of-the-siren🧜‍♀️ Also working on game development for Grim the RPG and learning how to design and layout! 100% by yours truly, including artwork. Side project Shamans also coming along.